


Repression

by FangirlReader221



Category: Jurassic Park - All Media Types, Jurassic Park Original Trilogy (Movies), Jurassic Park Series - Michael Crichton
Genre: Flashbacks, Gen, Ian angst is the best angst, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Thunderstorms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-29
Updated: 2019-08-29
Packaged: 2020-09-28 22:41:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20433659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FangirlReader221/pseuds/FangirlReader221
Summary: (I do not own mentioned characters or events)No matter how hard Ian tries, Jurassic Park cannot be blocked from his mind. Malcolm can never sleep anyway. But the thunderstorms bring it all back.





	Repression

Once again, maybe for the thousandth time, it’s past midnight and Ian Malcolm is still awake. The house is empty with no one else there, but he keeps himself busy. He won’t sleep. Outside, the rain hammers against the roof and, sitting at the kitchen table, Ian swallows hard. He gnaws on the end of a pen, trying to focus on grading papers. He really can’t though. Not with a thunderstorm outside.

For a moment, Ian actually wishes he could fall asleep. Even if he was woken by nightmares at least he wouldn’t have to suffer the storm.  
He knows the thunder is going to be loud and overwhelming and the lightning will be just like it was that night. _That night on Isla Nublar when-_ Swallowing hard, Ian stops himself. No. Thinking of that will not be helpful right now.

Ignoring the roars of the wind, he sips his coffee. _Most people don’t make coffee at 2 AM._ He thinks, amusing himself._ But then again, most people aren’t trying to avoid-_ He stops again. Groaning, Ian lays his head in his hands. His eyes burn when he shuts them.

“Stop,” He moans to himself, drawing out the word way longer than necessary. He feels his heart start to pick up speed in his chest. _Don’t think of this right now!_

Dr. Malcolm _hates_ storms.

The mathematician peers at the table from between his fingers for a moment. The papers are strewn about. One of his pens is missing too.

A flash of light blinks through the room and Ian jumps, adrenaline surging. After the lightning strike will come the thunder. His shoulders rise and fall as his breathing races to keep up with his heart. “Oh, G*d.” His hands shake as he braces himself, his fingers curl around the sides of the chair beneath him.

At last, the thunder arrives. The noise explodes through the house, seemingly rattling the walls. Ian is breathing so hard his throat burns. The wind outside is screaming and for a few seconds, it mixes with the thunder. The combination creates a roaring. The roaring floods Malcolm’s ears and it sounds a little like a roar very familiar to him now. _The Tyrannosaurus._ Her call fills into Ian’s head, drowning out all the other sounds. He claps his hands over his ears but the sound is still there.

Thunder explodes again with a white flash. Ian can feel the rain drenching his clothes and pasting his hair to his scalp. The roar is still there. His chest vibrates with how loud the dinosaur screams and he resists the urge to cover his ears. “Get rid of the flare!” He can see the T-Rex now. Her teeth are bared in a permanent snarl and she stands curled like a snake. But that doesn’t matter. Because the kids are going to die.

“Get the kids!” He shouts as loud as he can. That’s all that matters because he’s probably going to die. He’s doing to die and if there is one thing he’s willing to die for, its children. The cars are creaking and the rain is cold as it drips down his back and he can feel the mud through his shoes. The sparks of the flare burn his wrist and Ian runs for his life.

He trips. Malcolm gasps as his palms smack hardwood. His stomach is churning and he’s panting. “Where’s the rex?!” He gasps frantically as his wide eyes dart around the room. All that he can see is the apartment. Sitting at the bottom of the stairs, he tries to swallow back nausea that grows. _How did I get here?!_ Across the room, the chair at the table is knocked over and Ian bites his lip. All he can think about is locating the T-Rex. He doesn’t know where she is and he needs to know where she is.

Thunder claps once again and Ian tries not to jump. Why did it have to be storming? He feels like he’s going to throw up and his hands are shaking but outside the wind is still screaming bloody murder. Lightning flashes and he shudders. But he can’t stop it. It’s just like in 1993, during the storm, with the t-rex, and he’s going to die.

He barely registers the thunder as it rolls by once more. Instead, he curls himself up into a ball on the floor, at the bottom of the stairs. Ian wraps his arms around his long legs and clamps his eyes shut. His left leg is aching and he bites his lip.

Malcolm tried not to think about dinosaurs. Anything but dinosaurs. But it doesn’t work. The terror is still there. And he can’t ignore it, can’t stop it, can’t escape. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed, thank you for reading, God bless, and please leave feedback if you have anything to say!


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